An Approach to Time

An Approach to Time

 

Time; there’s never enough of it. No matter how much I feel like I can get done in a single day, I end up proving myself wrong day after day, expecting more of myself than twenty-four hours could ever allow. Maybe it’s the need to be satiated by what other people create while also creating myself that makes it so difficult for me to register the importance of time until it’s already spilled through my fingers. Or maybe it’s the need to contribute to the world outside of busywork projects and every little idea that pops into my head. I want to do it all, to the point where a priorities list just becomes a list of everything I haven’t achieved yet. But I am missing the one resource necessary to get all of it done, to break through that forsaken catalog of ideas and one by one start crossing off accomplishments. I am missing time.

 

It’s not about ambition, or anything having to do with remembrance. It’s just how many opportunities I can see before me, a world of possibility that I want to reach out and grab. But, as I go to do so, my fingers split off from one another. They find their ways to the possibilities I was longing for, but they never have enough strength to grasp them. They remain just as they were, possible, but never as anything other than a dream. It isn’t that I don’t have the strength to take one up and make it my own. It’s that there are so many that I can’t carry. And, once more, I find myself approaching the issue, but never to try and solve it. Instead I simply look, hoping that there can be some other way to make it all into anything other than gibberish. But there isn’t. It’s simply a matter of time.

 

Writing about it, reflecting on it, I can see that it’s not so much a problem with time as it is a problem with me. Even if everything feels like a priority, not everything should be treated as such. It’s all about trying to parse out what there is you can do to better that time management and ensure to yourself that you’re doing it right. Maybe you will be, maybe you won’t be, but you have to try. I have to try. Otherwise, how am I supposed to get anything done? I don’t want to leave anything half-finished anymore. There’s no better starting point than the present, than trying right here and now to better it so that when I set a schedule, when I see what’s important in front of me, it truly comes to light.

 

It’s time.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Gemini Home Entertainment: Cosmic Horror Meets Analog Video

Image
  Gemini Home Entertainment: Cosmic Horror Meets Analog Video Supernatural horror, as a genre, can come in many shapes and sizes. From books to television to even comic books, the idea of something unknown and unexplainable lurking just at the corners of human vision has always fascinated us. I should know, given I've written books inspired by those very ideas. But, with the Internet allowing storytellers more tools to create and share the worlds they envision, a whole new slew of horror content has been cropping up in the last decade or so. This ranges from shows like  Marble Hornets , a webseries about the popular, faceless Slenderman monster, to "creepypasta," Internet horror stories, some of which are incredibly chilling ("Candle Cove" being one of my favorites).  But recently, a new type of video has been cropping up on YouTube: Analog horror. A subgenre of found footage, analog horror typically throws away the idea that found footage has to rely on a chara...
Read more

The Last of Us: You Are Not Joel Miller

Image
[Warning: The following post will contain spoilers for the series premiere of HBO's  The Last of Us series.] I have never played The Last of Us . The only exposure I've ever had to the game was its gameplay reveal during E3 2012 and the opening scene on YouTube. That's it. The rest of my knowledge--that Joel and Ellie are two survivors in a zombie-like apocalypse that sprung from mutated Cordyceps that jumped from ants to humans--comes from cultural osmosis. I didn't know the plot of the game, what the characters were like, or what to expect from HBO's television adaptation of the critically-acclaimed action-adventure experience. I was in the dark, going into the series premiere on Sunday night only knowing what to expect out of the beginning of the episode. What I wasn't expecting was the way things were presented to me. I have to preface this with something important: The Last of Us Episode 1 is good. Not great, not perfect, but definitely not as bad as I expe...
Read more

The Walking Dead S11 E12: "The Lucky Ones" Review

Image
  The Walking Dead Season 11 Episode 12: "The Lucky Ones" Review [WARNING: Major spoilers for  The Walking Dead  seasons 1-10, spoilers for season 11.] With the previous episode of The Walking Dead giving us a little more insight as to what may be going on within darker confines of the Commonwealth, I was anticipating another episode that would elaborate on what had been established. What I didn't expect, however, was a mixed bag episode that both indicated what the conflict for Part 2 would be moving forward while also raising a lot of questions regarding the show's inner logistics. While this episode did excite me for what was to come, a lot of it felt like filler that could have been established within half an episode. Regardless, while I'm a bit iffy on the presentation, I am interested to see where the story is going and how it's going to differ from the comics--which is already evident given what's been happening. The major plot of this episode sees ...
Read more